Before I explain why I'm driving a 26 year old car, allow me to introduce you to my wonderful white teacher and trusty traveling companion (in the photo above).
I'm not really a car person but I have enjoyed driving our previous Saab and Mercedes. In hindsight I took them for granted in many ways.
But I have grown. So much so that never have I appreciated a set of wheels as much as those of my youthful, 26 year old Renault Clio.
Reliable and safe, she always gets me to my destination. She starts when I want her to, fits snugly into the tiniest of parking places and somehow I feel she is always on my side.
Even when she broke down, she kindly did so right outside a garage adjacent to a coffee shop, so I could enjoy refreshments with the kids while she was being taken care of. There is an ease between us that I have come to cherish.
Just to be clear though, this is not the second family car. It's the one I drive over 90% of the time. Julian has his own shiny, fresh Mercedes.
I say fresh because it is the height of summer as I write with temperatures in the 30's celcius (high 80's farenheit). His mighty motor has what most expect of air conditioning these days - cool air that can be deliciously directed towards toes or face on a whim.
The air conditioning in my car works in the following way: Level 1 is achieved by winding down one window. Level 2 is relalised with 2 windows open (preferably on opposite sides of the car for the luxury of a cross wind). And so on.
It doesn't quite reach level 4 because one of the windows requires considerable effort to open. So we settle into a maximum of 3.5 when it's really hot. With the result that, when in direct sunshine, sweat dribbles down the distance between my breasts.
A decade or more ago this would have bothered me a lot. I would have perceived it as an unfair, unequal distribution of resources. I should have a 'good' car too.
Now I see it as a privilege. Not because most of the world doesn't own or have access to a car (although that perspective did help to shift my attitude).
But my relationship with this beautiful car has taught be a lot about the experience of women in our male world and helped me leverage at a much deeper level my feminine power.
What follows is an explanation....
The first reason why I'm driving a 26 year old car, is because this is actually an accurate reflection of where I am at financially.
What I mean by that is because I have a bigger vision for my life and my creative contribution, I have chosen to invest my resources (time, energy and money) in ways that allow me to be the woman I came here to be.
My intention is to educate women about the role of the feminine in fertility and the creative process so that we can leverage our Creative Feminine™ in the ways most meaningful to us. And co-create with my tribe a new paradigm in fertility and motherhood on the planet - one that allows us all to thrive (instead of the current model that so often depletes women of our dignity and dynamism).
Because what we have learned about female fertility, womanhood and motherhood are male ideas - influenced by the premise that the feminine is inferior to the masculine. And within this framework the notions of feminine wisdom or the intrinsic value of woman are nothing less than comic.
I am dedicating my life to co-creating a reality in which women understand our Creative Feminine™ power so we can approach our fertility and our private and professional lives with confidence, empowerment and leadership - regardless of age. Because the Creative Feminine™ is ageless.
This means that I invest a huge amount in myself and my vision (my own personal coaching and training, creating value for my tribe) and setting myself up to be able to sustain this in the long-term. Rather than make other purchases now that are unnecessary or prevent me from being most effective.
My Clio has helped me to see how the patriarchal training to 'look good' ensures that women spew our Creative Feminine™ resources into places that prevent us from bringing our gifts and wisdom to the world - in any meaningful way. (See my posts on giving power to patriarchy, preventing preecplampsia and menopause and sleep for more on this subject.)
So every time I drive her, I remember that she is evidence of me pouring my Creative Feminine™ into what I choose to create, rather that what looks successful or appropriate to others.
Because at the end of the day that is what matters most deeply to me a woman and a mother.
But there is more to why I'm driving a 26 year old car - or why I have come to value her so much.
As women, we have been led to be dependent on some patriarchal institution or another (a man, an employer and/or a bank for example). With the result that many women are driving lovely, new cars but without any personal wealth of their own. Often stuck in relationships they are desperate to leave.
It looks good from a patriarchal perspective but it hides the truth that millions of mothers are entirely dependent on somebody else financially.
As girls we are fed the 'happily ever after' version of life - which happens once you meet your mate (male of course).
But it's a myth that suits the patriarchal status quo and primes females to fuel our male world - as we have done for millennia. (I have discussed this further in posts on fertility energy being drained, using up energy I need to have a baby and this one that explores if you might be hurting your fertility during the holidays.)
So it feels great that Julian has his magnetic Merc while I drive my candid Clio.
Because it reflects a deeper reality for women in the world. One that I want my girls to know about - so that they can intend to be in their power financially even before motherhood arrives (should they decide to choose that path).
I hope there was value in this for you and would love to hear your experience or opinion on why I'm driving a 26 year old car. Please share below because your feminine contribution here really, really matters!