The topic of feminine power has been around for a long time. But it is only recently that we are really asking questions about what that might look like.
I have explored the link between feminine power and feminine sensuality previously as it is so very deep. And also how important it is to believe in your feminine on your journey as a woman. Especially post 40 - after which patriarchy (our male world) is inclined to put a woman's value and feminine power on life support.
Because it does not understand the role of the feminine in the creative process. And simply cannot conceive of, yet, a reality in which the feminine is truly empowered.
This audio and article below came about in response to a request from Jessie - one of the beautiful members of our tribe. Jessie was experiencing bullying in her family and feeling disconnected from her feminine power. The following is an extract of what she shared with me:
"Dear Deirdre, I would like to develop my own inner "power from within". But I still respond to the bullying with looking for "power over" as a first reaction, because I feel so powerless that I want something that makes them back down and makes them stop.
I feel ashamed that I don't have the power from within that I need to free myself.... I know not getting protection or help is what had happened to me when I was little and now I am not little any more, but I still FEEL the same way...
I was not even able to admit that to myself before, because I felt so ashamed of myself, that I was not able to solve this, that I still feel like a little child, in "victim mode", not knowing how to act like a grown up.
I don't know where to start with this. How do I develop my personal feminine power from within, especially in this situation? Any light on this would help a lot."
Thank you so much, Jessie, for sharing this. With the intention of serving you here, I would first like to remind you that, in patriarchy, we have been taught to feel powerless. Especially as women. Feeling powerless, indeed, has been the norm at some level. Because when it comes to engaging our feminine and feeling our feminine power, we have not had permission to do that.
In fact, feeling our feminine power has been dangerous (and still is for many women). In addition, your own family system was very fragile Jessie - and probably would not have tolerated a more empowered you.
And I say that because the first step in you feeling your feminine power from within, is to make peace with the powerlessness. Instead of judging yourself - which keeps you in that victim role - I am inviting you to create a new feminine story for yourself around your experience.
You can do that by, for example, identifying the feminine power and wisdom within your experience of powerlessness. And even open up to the possibility that the way you have shown up with your family has been the wisest feminine response until now. Because you did not have:
I invite you to accept that, given these circumstances, your response was an empowered response from within. Because your feminine wisdom was biding her time - to help you create an environment in which is is safe for you to show up in your true feminine power. And it sounds like that time has come Jessie!
Next, I am hearing different angles of feminine wisdom as you admit to yourself that you feel ashamed about how you have responded. Here are a few of them:
(1) Instead of pretending happy families, as patriarchy has trained us to do, you are calling a spade a spade.
(2) No longer believing that you should hide your feelings, you are trusting more that there is feminine wisdom within them. Even if they are uncomfortable.
(3) In your reaching out for help, you are expressing a knowing within that you are much more than these patriarchal games and that you deserve help to reconnect with your feminine power now.
Your feminine power within is defying old ideas and willing to take the risk that there might be another way. Because she knows....
Finally, I would like to address the part where you say that you are not sure how to act like a grown up. I invite you to consider, Jessie, that this might be a very good thing!
Being "grown up" is, in may ways, an act. Because in patriarchy, being grown up means we pretend that:
What I'm feeling from your question is that, rather than learn how to act, you really yearn to be authentic to yourself. Authentic to the woman and mother you were born to be.
And I see you doing that beautifully Jessie with your very honest sharing, acceptance of your true feelings and allowing yourself to be exactly where you are. I also see your feminine power within standing tall as you ask for what you really want and help to achieve that.
So even if you perceive yourself as not having budged one inch since you were a child, you have taken a quantum leap in your journey as a woman (and your fertility journey) Jessie.
I see this in so many ways and I'm inviting you to review again your story (and fertility history) - to tell it with your feminine glasses on. It might sound something like this for example:
"I have re-connected with my feminine power within. I can see evidence of that as I accept my feelings and respect them, am honest with myself, discern what I really want, reach out for support and move towards the best vision I have for me. Even when life around me is chaotic!"
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