Feminine Power – 3 Tips To Connect With Yours Now

feminine power

​​Feminine Power  

​The topic of feminine power has been around for a long time. But it is only recently that we are really asking questions about what that might look like.  

​I have explored the link between feminine power and feminine sensuality previously as it is so very deep. And also how important it is to believe in your feminine on your journey as a woman. Especially post 40 - after which patriarchy (our male world) is inclined to put a woman's value and feminine power on life support.

Because it does not understand the role of the feminine in the creative process. And simply cannot conceive of, yet, a reality in which the feminine is truly empowered.

​Feminine Power Within

This audio and article below came about in response to a request from Jessie - one of the beautiful members of our tribe. Jessie was experiencing bullying in her family and feeling disconnected from her feminine power. ​The following is an extract of what she shared with me:

this audio comes about in response to a message I received from Chloe who was 45 and pregnant.

"Dear Deirdre,​ I would like to develop my own inner "power from within". But I still respond to the bullying with looking for "power over" as a first reaction, because I feel so powerless that I want something that makes them back down and makes them stop.

I feel ashamed that I don't have the power from within that I need to free myself.... I know not getting protection or help is what had happened to me when I was little and now I am not little any more, but I still FEEL the same way...

​I was not even able to admit that to myself before, because I felt so ashamed of myself, that I was not able to solve this, that I still feel like a little child, in "victim mode", not knowing how to act like a grown up.

 I don't know where to start with this. How do I develop my personal feminine power from within, especially in this situation? Any light on this would help a lot."

Deirdre, how do we deal with pregnancy after so much history? I fear I don't have the tools to be a confident pregnant woman.
. I'd like to support you is just to share what I hear in that question. And what is happening. It sounds like it is that you're reviewing your history of many efforts and many attempts and the feeling of failure where you've tried and it hasn't working for tried and it hasn't worked. And this has been repeated over and over in different ways in your fertility journey in your motherhood journey. And so I'd just like to remind you here that this kind of approach or interpretation of our fertility journey is very much a patriarca one in which success is only seen in terms of the outcome, the project the baby. And you were being invited to engage your feminine wisdom here because that's history his story the patriarchal interpretation and is time for her story, your story the feminine version of what has unfolded for you over the last year to show up here now because if you reflect back on all this journey you will see clearly how each of those experiences have helped you to show-up more authentically to discern Who you really want to be in the world and have added to your empowerment to your sense of serve to your sense of integrity to your confidence and to your allowing yourself to be you instead of having to do this in a particular way at a particular time. This journey has made you step up and say you know I want it now even if the circumstances aren't perfect according to the patriarchal download.

Feminine Powerlessness​​ ​

​Thank you so much, Jessie, for sharing this. ​With the intention of serving you here, I would first like to remind you that, in patriarchy, we have been taught to feel powerless. Especially as women. Feeling powerless, indeed, has been the norm at some level. Because when it comes to engaging our feminine and feeling our feminine power, we have not had permission to do that.

In fact, feeling our feminine power has been dangerous (and still is for many women). ​In addition, your own family system was very fragile Jessie - and probably would not have tolerated a more empowered you.

And I say that because the first step in you feeling your feminine power from within, is to make peace with the powerlessness. Instead of judging yourself - which keeps you in that victim role - I am inviting you to create a new feminine story for yourself around your experience.​​

The Power Within Your Powerlessness

You can do that by, for example, identifying the feminine power and wisdom within your experience of powerlessness. And even open up to the possibility that the way you have shown up with your family has been the wisest feminine response until now. Because you did not have:​

  • ​And understanding of how your creative feminine works
  • ​​Somebody to guide you into your feminine power in a way that is safe for you
  • ​A tribe that really wants you thrive (instead of maintaining patriarchal expectations)

​I invite you to accept that, given these circumstances, your response was an empowered response from within. Because your feminine wisdom was biding her time - to help you create an environment in which is is safe for you to show up in your true feminine power. And it sounds like that time has come Jessie!

Patriarchal Shame

​Next, ​I am hearing different angles of feminine wisdom as you admit ​to yourself that you feel ashamed about how you have responded. Here are a few of them:

(1) Instead of pretending happy families, as patriarchy has trained us to do, you are calling a spade a spade.

(2) No longer believing that you should hide your feelings, you are trusting more that there is feminine wisdom within them. Even if they are uncomfortable.

(3) In your reaching out for help, you are expressing a knowing within that you are much more than these patriarchal games and that you deserve help to reconnect with your feminine power now.  

​Your feminine power within is defying old ideas and willing to take the risk that there might be another way. Because she knows....

Behaving Like A Grown Up

​Finally, I would like to address the part where you say that you are not sure how to act like a grown up.  I invite you to consider, Jessie, that this might be a very good thing!

​Being "grown up" is, in may ways, an act. Because in patriarchy, being grown up means we pretend that:

  • ​we don’t feel anything
  • ​we are satisfied with a superficial life
  • ​we are not worthy or capable of having what we really want

​What I'm feeling from your question ​is that, rather than learn how to act, you really yearn to be authentic to yourself. Authentic to the woman and mother you were born to be.

And I see you doing that beautifully Jessie with your very honest sharing, acceptance of your true feelings and allowing yourself to be exactly where you are. I also see your feminine power within standing tall as you ask for what you really want and help to achieve that.

​Feminine Conclusions

​​So even if you perceive yourself as not having budged one inch since you were a child, you have taken a quantum leap in your journey as a woman (and your fertility journey​) Jessie.  

I see this in so many ways and I'm inviting you to review again your story (and fertility history​) - to tell it with your feminine glasses on. It might sound something like this for example:

"I have re-connected with my feminine power within. I can see evidence of that as I accept my feelings and respect them, am honest with myself, discern what I really want, reach out for support and move towards the best vision I have for me. Even when life around me is chaotic!"

And each of those experiences those baby's those attempts have added to you as a woman even if that's not obvious to the medical model or to patriarchy. And so I'd really be inviting you to really connect with your story in a new way and forget the patriarchal history so that you can write your own story and that links to the form stage of my feminine engagement method. But you are really being invited here now to switch that mantra in your head about failure and last in two one hour gain and empowerment and I'd actually be asking you to go through each of those parent classes and of course many of them will have been difficult and painful.
Audio - ​Feminine Power Within 

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