​Thoughts around creating healthy follicles and eggs ​often tag along on the fertility journey. Especially if you resonate with the theme: 'want a baby but feeling old​'.

This post was inspired by an article ​addressing technological developments in fertility​. ​It shared that ​creating viable eggs- mice eggs- has been achieved successfully in the laboratory. Giving rise to live births.

That in itself is worthy of a post but what actually interested me most about the article was the description of the follicle it shared.....

Because although I may have read these exact words elsewhere, this time it altered my perception of our fabulous follicular friends. (Just as a reminder, the follicle is a fluid-filled sac that contains an immature egg).

Here is how the author, Ellie Kinsaid, put it...

​Upon reading this the third time, the howl of feminine wisdom became a din in my ear as it dawned on me that ​the follicle refers to the support system as well as the egg.

​Let me put that another just to make sure we are on the same feminine page here - on the issue of creating healthy follicles at least.

Without an appropriate feminine support system, there will not be an egg. There cannot be an egg.  In the absence of genuine support, in other words, your creative feminine simply cannot produce the most fundamental feminine ingredient needed to have a baby.

​That, in my view, is a crystal clear message from feminine wisdom. And, as I discovered on my own fertility journey, it is true also on an emotional level.

While it might be more obvious later in motherhood - when your baby has arrived - feminine wisdom is lowing here that appropriate feminine support not only breaths fire into your creativity and motherhood. It is an intrisic part of your creative feminine.

​And it came to me that, in our patriarchal world, the systems that have been considered supportive have not actually felt safe for many of us.

Or maybe we feel secure on a physical level. But vulnerable emotionally. Afraid of expressing our truth, daring to be different or flourishing as women.  

​Often the feminine support with which we have spent most of our time has been caring primarily about maintaining the patriarchal status quo. And has encouraged only growth in directions that patriarchy has decided are appropriate for us as women. And for you according to your position in the clan (whatever clan that might be).

It's not personal - just part of the download. But it's huge nonetheless. Especially ​if you want to have a baby after 48 or 55. Because that is pushing the patriarchal envelop a bit far still - socially at least.

​But it's time to set fire to a few patriarchal myths that have restricted us in receiving this feminine fuel for creating healthy follicles. ​Let's begin with the following:

The fact that a woman is your mother, sister, aunt, cousin, neighbour, a part of your class or clan does not mean that she truly cares necessarily. And it certainly does not follow that she wants you to grow and thrive. There may well be love and care there of course.​

But time and time again, I have assumed that ​this woman would want the best for me because we are related for example. Or we have some shared history. And I was wrong. It can happen for sure and often does. But we have been led to expect this from family when it is, in fact, a myth.

​Patriarchy, however, wants us to maintain these relationships anyway because it's the patriarchal family that matters. Not what feels like family to you.

​In my view, fertility facts ​about egg reserves running out​, for example, or eggs running out in general are reflecting something much deeper about the experience of being a woman in the world.

​So many of us have been depleted by patriarchal 'support' systems that want us to stay small. And we are tangled up in emotional environments in which creating healthy follicles is simply impossible.

​Especially after 45. Instead, they ensure ​that the 'fertility energy being drained' experience continues. And lead us to conclude,  eventually, that it must be false hope in fertility after 50.

After which the patriarchal "I told you so" is ushered in. Because it's not okay ​to desire what you desire, to challenge limits that have been placed on women for generations. Or to reclaim female fertility for ourselves as women.

​But you have the power to leverage this feminine wisdom in your fertility now. You can start by giving yourself permission to really look at your relationships and ask yourself the following:

​Be present with what comes up for you with these questions because it matters. In my experience, we underestimate enormously the negative impact of relationships that pour water on our creative feminine fire.

If you are not sure how to bring more nourishing feminine relationships into your life, then begin by participating more here in our community. Share your opinion. Ask questions. Respond to others and be the 'helper' cell for other women daring to Engage the Feminine® in female fertility after 40, 50 and well, well beyond!