Coping With Secondary Infertility – Feminine Wisdom

coping with secondary infertility

Coping With Secondary Infertility   

Coping with secondary infertility has it's own challenges. You should be grateful, right? For having at least one biological child already. Without fertility treatments.

And coping with secondary infertility has been explored by others in these articles for example: 5 ways to cope and 7 ways to cope. Here, I would like to consider this topic while engaging feminine wisdom....

Coping With Secondary Infertility -
The Diagnosis

When I hear the question "how do I cope with secondary infertility", a few things come up for me. One is our relationship with diagnosis. It is true that in some circumstances it is so important for this to happen. Fast. And medical diagnosis (when it is an actual diagnosis) is very, very valuable.

However, there are situations in which, I believe, a diagnosis does not serve. So when you ask about coping with secondary infertility, I would be wondering about the appropriateness of that diagnosis in the first place. Now this questioning is not something that is encouraged in patriarchy. Where we have been taught to accept totally the masculine mindset which moulded the medical model.

But it is important to remember here that we have not been Engaging the Feminine™ in this dominant understanding of fertility on the planet. And we have disregarded the role of feelings and the feminine (beyond the biological) in the co-creative process. So it makes sense, from a patriarchal perspective, that a woman could be given a diagnosis of secondary infertility. But when we 'get' that: 

  • Our feelings and thoughts matter in the co-creative process
  • How we feel about a diagnosis matters
  • Our relationship with the diagnosis influences our results...... we will think twice about whether to accept it or not.

Coping With Secondary Infertility -
Feminine Wisdom

Instead of wondering how to accept secondary infertility, give yourself permission not to receive that diagnosis. As something that describes who you are. And not to start sharing with others "I have secondary infertility". Because that is going to help to ground this version of reality in your life.

It's like the self-fulfilling prophecy that we've known about in psychology for decades. When we believe something or expect a particular result from somebody, we fulfil that. So a teacher will fulfil her expectations in her pupils. The same applies to ourselves. When we accept a limit about ourselves, we will find proof of that limit. So, my response around coping with secondary infertility is two-fold.

(1) I invite you not accept a diagnosis of secondary infertility. This does not mean that you close the door to the best medical and natural remedies for secondary infertility. But intend instead to engage your feminine wisdom here. She is also tapped into the invisible variables involved. And your deepest desires and authentic truth. Let her help you to flower on every level!

(2) And, maintain your focus on what you want which is evidence of your fertility. Revel in all signs of that including your child and the beautiful life-force there!

Video - Coping With Secondary Infertility

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