Does the thought "I'm afraid I can't have a baby at my age" sometimes sneak its way into your awareness? Perhaps "sneak" is the wrong word here. Let me rephrase that. Does the idea "I'm afraid I can't have a baby at my age" ever bear-hug your entire being squeezing out all other thoughts?
While not every woman over 40 has this concern, fear about not being able to conceive or become a mom is probably familiar to most women TTC in their fifth decade and beyond. This video and post came about in response to the question below....
How do I get rid of the fear that I might
not be able to have a baby at my age?
We have been conditioned into getting rid of stuff that we don't like. This is a very typical response in a world that has been inspired by a patriarchal model. Fight or destroy what we don't want.
Our feminine energy, on the other hand, is an energy that embraces. It includes. It's very expansive. And a response that's connected also to the feminine, doesn't really rely on tactics such as "getting rid of". That's just not part of the repertoire. Because, when we're Engaging the Feminine® we have access to a much broader prospective.
So give yourself permission not to have to "get rid" of this fear and notice how that feels. Perhaps it's okay that you're fearful about this. Perhaps it's very natural. Oftentimes our resistance to our emotions actually creates more angst in us. And this diverts our creative energy away from what we really want to create. Just the process of allowing ourselves to feel what we feel can bring such relief. And it facilitates a feminine shift at a much deeper level.
If you are thinking "I'm afraid I can't have a baby at my age", I would invite you to remember the following. A lot of the fear around not having a baby comes from a very limited understanding of what woman is. Or how a whole woman shows up.
In other words, we have this idea that a woman can only be fulfilled if she has children. Obvious in some cultures more than others, it permeates most of our traditions and stems from a patriarchal understanding of woman and mother.
Patriarchy is tuned into what is visible. Breasts for nursing for example (not going to go into the sexual piece in this post). And, it is very obvious that women give birth. Plus, emphasising the value of these female roles ensures that the patriarchal status quo can continue.
When the thought "I'm afraid I can't have a baby at my age" comes up, remember this. You are being invited into a different relationship with motherhood, yourself as a woman, with your feelings and with the feminine.
When wondering how to stop worrying about not getting pregnant, open up to becoming comfortable with your feelings. Instead of trying to get rid of them, reconnect with your feminine and allow them to be. Trust that in some way, these feelings are guiding you into the most beautiful expression of you and your life that you've ever dreamed.
Let them help you navigate your own authentic path in this world as a woman even if you don't understand it fully yet. When you do that, you will find yourself one day being grateful for the thought "I'm afraid I can't have a baby at my age" and the gift it birthed in your life and your family!
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